11/29/2000

Man, am I ready to start jettisoning cats left and right (except, of course, for Miz Poo). This morning I decided I’d get Fred to help me take the mattress and boxspring off the bed so I could wash the skirt covering the boxspring and vacuum under the bed since it’s been about two years since I last did so. Before he left a little before 6, we stripped the bed and put the mattress and boxspring against the wall. Four hours or so later (after exercising, cleaning the basement, and taking my shower) I went back upstairs to get dressed and vacuum under the bed. While vacuuming not only under the bed but also under the two bedside tables, I glanced to my left and saw the comforter, which I’d tossed in the corner when we were stripping the bed. Except, it didn’t look quite right. I went closer to look and imagine my thrill – one or more of our little bastards had decided to shit on the comforter because they didn’t like that things were different. You know, Miz Poo NEVER poos anywhere but the litter box. I don’t know who did defile the comforter, but I have my suspicions (oops, almost linked to the spud on that one!). Damn those damn boy cats, shitting all over the damn place (though I know they don’t really shit all OVER the place; this sort of thing only really happens a few times a year but when it does it REALLY pisses me off). I seriously considered just tossing the little bastards out the back door and leaving them there all day, but since I don’t know for sure who did it, I can’t really blame them all, can I? Fred stopped on the way home and bought a new bed-in-a-bag. Fucking $300. If I knew whodunnit, I’d beat that $300 right out of his ass, the little bastard. I don’t even dare to leave the door to the master bedroom open because when we got the spud’s new bed the Christmas before last and set it up, someone ran in there and peed all over the damn thing when I was out of the room for three minutes. I sure as shit don’t want any of them doing the same to our new comforter, so for now they’re banished when we’re not in the room. The problem with having so many cats is that you never really know who to blame. I’ll be back tomorrow and in a better mood.

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