itchy sandpaper. Yes, I was covered from neck to ankles with an itchy red sandpaper-textured rash. My skin apparently woke up and realized that I’d been smothering it with oil for the last week, and it got PISSED. Oh, it itches. Oh, it hurts. Oh, I AM SUCH A DUMBASS. I know that this will pass and in a few weeks I’ll be back to my normal dry-skinned self, but that’s not much consolation when I wake up in the middle of the night to find that I’m frantically scratching my butt-cheeks. And that wasn’t the last of my dumbassery for Saturday, oh no – of COURSE not. For dinner Saturday night, we had Karawynn’s Ex-Texas Chili (well, not hers, but I used her recipe to make it. You know what I mean). Instead of, as Karawynn suggests, washing my hands with a salt and water paste after chopping the jalapenos, I just used soap. HOURS later, whilst taking my contacts from my eyes while getting ready for bed, can you guess what happened? That’s right, my eyes just about bulged out of my head and started burning, because I’m a dumbass. Not happy eyes, let me tell you. And I got my fingers all over my contacts, so what do you suppose happened when I went to put them in my eyes Sunday morning? That’s right, bulging and burning. I ended up having to throw the contacts away, due to my dumbassery. Lest you think I do nothing but bitch on this page (ha! You KNOW I do nothing but bitch on this page, right?), I will say that my knee is completely better this morning and I was able to exercise as planned. But don’t get me started on the road construction I had to walk around… —–]]>