Sea Captain’s House – and had the buffet for breakfast. They had these little pastries that were just awesome, and of course they had biscuits and gravy and grits, so we were all happy. After stuffing ourselves at breakfast, we went back to the apartment where we sat around and watched a little more TV before deciding that it was such a beautiful day we needed to go shopping. My father said he’d stay at the apartment – I think he was glad the spud and I were there so he didn’t have to go shopping, because he’s not so crazy about shopping, crazy man – and my mother, the spud, and I left. During our driving around the night before my father had pointed out places to shop. Since my mother doesn’t really drive if there’s someone else to drive (I do the same thing!), I drove the Jeep and we headed straight for Barefoot Landing. Barefoot Landing is very, very cool. It’s a shopping center with a lot of little shops, then there’s a small lake with boardwalks across to the other side in three places, and on the other side are more shops and restaurants. In the lake are ducks and carp, and you can buy duck/ fish food from a dispenser and feed them.

(One of the few places we didn’t eat ice cream at while we were in SC)
We got some excellent bargains in the first few shops we visited – I got a pair of Tevas to use as water shoes for $16, another pair of Tevas and some sandals. Now, when it comes to sandals, I can’t stand to wear the kind with the strap that goes between your toes, but I found a pair of Bass sandals that I liked so much I convinced myself that I could get used to the feeling. Before we got through the first five or six stores, we had to send the spud back to the Jeep twice to drop off our bags. We stopped and had Diet Cokes at Johnny Rockets and talked for a while. Refreshed, we went back out to do some more shopping. I don’t remember the name of it, but there was a shop with great t-shirts, and I ended up buying three of them for Fred (I’ll have to take pictures of those at a later date). They also had a PERFECT t-shirt for him, but I didn’t buy it for him, because it was in black, and we just can’t have dark shirts in this hair due to all the cat hair.
After an ice cream cone and a trip to the bathroom, we decided to head for the other side of the lake. First we stopped and fed the ducks and fish.
(click on image to see the full-sized version)
(click on image to see the full-sized version)
Once we got on the other side of the lake, we did more shopping (but of course) and found another place to stop and feed carp, only these carp were absolutely huge – three feet long and willing to kill each other to get to the food. There were a couple of small turtles who kept getting knocked out of the way by the carp, so I lured the carp to one part of the boardwalk, and then my mother dropped food for the turtles.
(click on image to see the full-sized version)
We did a little more shopping, but my feet were starting to hurt and it was getting late – I think we did about 5 hours of shopping that day – so we headed back to the apartment. On the way out of the Barefoot Landing parking lot we saw Dick’s, which a few of you had mentioned in the comments to the entry where I let y’all know I was going to Myrtle Beach. I didn’t have internet access while in Myrtle Beach, but Fred read my comments and told me what they said. I pointed it out to my mother and claimed that Fred’s sister had recommended the restaurant and suggested we go there for dinner. My father was amenable to visiting Dick’s for dinner, so after we all freshened up, we got in the car and headed back to Barefoot Landing.
We went in and sat down and looked around to see a lot of the other people there wearing condom hats with obnoxious things written on them. The waitress came to take our drinks order, and then she delivered our drinks and as she was walking away she turned and flung a handful of straws at the table.
(click on image to see the full-sized version)
We were sitting there looking at the menu, trying to decide whether we wanted an appetizer when a guy walked up and without a word started putting bibs on the spud and my father. Since my mother and I were on the other side of the table, he threw our bibs at us and walked off. It’s somehow funny as hell when you walk into a restaurant knowing that the wait staff is going to be rude to you, and then they are.
We ordered an appetizer platter (the waitress said “They’re your arteries!”) and then my mother and I ordered the half rack of ribs, the spud ordered the caesar salad, and my father ordered the fish and chips. The food was excellent, and despite the rudeness the service was excellent as well. We were almost done eating and half-hoping the waitress wouldn’t make hats for us, when she walked up with them. She eyeballed the spud, picked up one of the hats, and wrote something on it. She plopped it on the spud’s head, I read what it said, and burst out laughing.
(“That rotten smell is coming from my ass”)
Poor spud. She took off her hat, read what it said, and turned bright, flaming red. Then the waitress did my father’s hat, one for me, and one for my mother.
(Dad – “Rogaine is screwing me”) (Mom – “Same panties day 3”) (Me – “My new thong is killing my butthole”)
The worst one I saw was at a table of four guys who had the same waitress as us. The first hat she did said “My ass is killing me from the pounding I got last night” and an arrow pointing at the guy sitting next to him. The guy read it, his face turned bright flaming red, and he immediately took it off and wouldn’t put it back on. It was a good restaurant and the rudeness was entertaining (the waitress, upon asking if we wanted dessert, said “It’s gotta be better than the crap you had for dinner.”) but I don’t know if it’s so much a restaurant you want to take a kid to. The spud was pretty horrified by her hat (though she was willing to put it back on so I could take a picture of her in it; she’s such a good sport) and when she read the “My ass is killing me” hat on the guy a few tables over, she turned so red she about burst into flames. Oh, digression: I got a look from a guy sitting at the table behind ours, not once but twice. I got the definite feeling it was a “Hey, I read your journal!” look. Anyone want to confess? Anyway, we left Dick’s and then walked along the boardwalk/ bridge leading to Alligator Adventure (which was closed) and looked at the turtles, ducks, and fish in the pond. The sun was going down and it was kind of pretty. It was while I was trying to zoom in on one of the turtles that I realized that the zoom wasn’t working – that is, the lens would zoom in, but once zoomed, it wouldn’t focus on what I was trying to take a picture of, and the pictures were extremely blurry. I hadn’t realized that was going on earlier in the day, which is why I don’t have any pictures of the 3-foot-long carp to show you.
(click on image to see the full-sized version)
We walked back to the car and then drove over to the Alabama Theatre (that’s Alabama the group, not the state) to look through their gift shop. None of us saw anything we wanted to buy, so we got BACK in the car and went to a store called, simply enough, Bargains. If you’ve ever been to Gatlinburg or Ft. Walton Beach, you’ve seen those stores called Wings, right? Bargains is the exact same kind of store – all the t-shirts and souvenirs you could ever want. They had small aquariums with itty bitty frogs and snails in them, with a sign saying that the aquariums only needed to be cleaned out 3 – 4 times a year and you’d get a free year’s supply of food thrown in if you bought one. I spent a long, long time looking at the frogs – they were so frickin’ cute! – but in the end decided it was the last thing we needed. I still kind of wish I’d gone ahead and bought one, though! I bought some t-shirts and a keychain, and my mother bought the spud a fleece zip-up jacket, and then we headed back to the apartment for the night. More about Myrtle Beach tomorrow. Lucky you!
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“Don’t make me come kick your ass, water bottle. Because I will, and you’ll cry like the pansy you are.”