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IT IS FUCKING COLD OUT THERE. And y’all shut up with your “I’m in Alaska, and it’s thirty below here!” It was ten below with the windchill this morning, and my husband went running in it. His testicles crawled so far up into his body we’ll be lucky if we see them again by June. Right now it’s, like, ten degrees out and I had to go to the bank, but because it rained like hell last night and then dropped way below freezing, my doors were frozen shut. I had to take a hammer to the handle to get into the fucking car, and then I had to warm it up for ten minutes to even be able to sit in it, and THEN I had to clean the fucking puddle of antifreeze/ coolant off the driveway so that no neighborhood strays would come along and slurp it up, and die a painful death.
I live in Alabama. IT IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THIS FUCKING COLD.
Days like today make me seriously want to move to Florida. Fred won’t go for that, though – there are no freakin’ mountains in Florida.
Thank god for space heaters and gas fireplaces on days like this.
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Also? It’s FLURRYING.
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Things I have noticed about 24, Season Three:
1. At least once – but usually many, many times – in every episode, Jack tells someone “You’ve got to trust me” or “You have my word.” Jack is a word-giving motherfucker.
2. No one ever uses their mouse. “Floopy the flip flop!” Tony will order, and Kim turns to her computer and immediately begins typing. No mousing into position, or clicking from one program to the other. Do these people even
have mouses mice?
3. Michelle kicks ass. I wasn’t crazy about her in Season Two, what with the moony looks at Tony, but she’s totally kicking ass in this season. After she’d done something I won’t go into so as not to spoil it for those of you who haven’t seen it, I turned to Fred and said “I guess you don’t fuck with Michelle!”
4. Chapelle has got one seriously crooked nose.
We have about eight episodes left to watch. We’re going to be seriously sad when we’re done. This show is like crack – every time we finish an episode, I try to talk Fred into watching another. And sometimes it works! Hell, we stayed up ’til 9:30 the other night just to squeeze another episode in, instead of going to bed at our usual time.
Gotta love that Jack Bauer.
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Every once in a while I like to check the PicoSearch stats for my site to see what people are searching for. In particular, I like to see what people are searching for that they’re not finding. The latest list:
Chickpea and
Chickpeas. Probably this is a “not found” because I spell it in two workds (chick pea) rather than one. I’m not sure which is correct, though. A quick check of m-w.com says that it’s one word, not two. Who knew?
Pile of money. It was a joke. I was kidding about having a pile of money, so that I could bitch about using it all to have my Jeep fixed last month.
Big fat looser. I don’t know what this person was searching for – maybe my opinion about The Biggest Loser? I’ve watched every show so far, by the way, and it’s grown on me. It’s pretty amazing to see the week-by-week changes in the people on the show. Also, one “o” in Loser. “Looser” is what your pants get when you’re a big fat loser.
Rolo and
rolo cookies. I’m sure this is coming back with a “nothing found” because I haven’t reindexed the site since I put up the link to the recipe. If you’re looking for the Rolo cookie recipe, click on the “recipes” link over there on the right under “other”. The recipe is listed under desserts, I think. Any recipe I’ve mentioned (except that for sweet potato crack) is going to be in the recipes section.
Cat Town. It’s
here.
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Speaking of cookies – like I was up there, kinda – last Friday I made the
Secret Kiss cookies, only I intended to use Rolos instead of Kisses, at Fred’s request. Except when I got to the store, do you suppose they HAD Rolos? Of COURSE not. So I made a batch of cookies using miniature Snicker’s in place of the Kisses, and they were REALLY amazingly good. I’ll have to make another batch of those sometime.
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Speaking of PicoSearch, does anyone have any recommendations for simple-to-use personal site search engines? I’m about 50 pages away from the 1500-page Free PicoSearch maximum, and after that their cheapest pay plan is $250 a year and I’m sorry, I love y’all, but I don’t love y’all THAT much. Any suggestions would be appreciated.
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“Dat’s right, Momma, I’m laying in your seat, and you can’t do NOTHIN’ about it! Ha! Ha!”
“He thinks I don’t know he’s holding that fucking toy over my head, trying to annoy me. In about ten seconds I’m going to chomp his hand right off his arm.”
“You DAMN kids and your DAMN cameras! All the time flashing the fucking flash in my face! Why, in my day we din’t HAVE cameras! If we wanted to show pictures, we had to DRAW them from MEMORY, using coal from the FIRE and a piece of BARK!”
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