Give up and let those frickin’ cats run, Forrest, Run! They won’t go further than their own self-imposed territories and will alway come back in bad weather and for chow. They really never run away unless they totally hate you!
and
I must admit, I’ve been rooting for Mister “Douchebag” Boogers. I know that y’all are concerned about him getting himself hurt, but it seems he’s happiest roaming. I didn’t say anything back when it happened, but I was a little sad to hear the story that ended up with Boog rolling around in the dirt drooling because he was being zapped. I really couldn’t get it out of my head (and I mean it in a totally non-judgmental way — I own 4 cats myself and I can see how much you lurve and care for all of them). My 4th cat, Barnabas J. Barnkitten (of whom I’m DYING to share a pic — he’s a tuxedo cat & just the cutest, cuddliest boy you ever saw in your life), came to me as a stray — just showed up in our post pile one day. He’d be heartbroken if we didn’t allow him to roam and loves to go on walks out to the “back 40” with me and my dog, Lola — he also likes to mew pitifully at my sliding glass door at 3 in the morning so he can come snuuuggle with me on my piiiiillow. I’m not sure where I’m going with this — maybe just to ask you to consider letting the Boogs roam. I live on a busy road and none of my cats have ever been interested in it.
The problems here are that Mister Boogers isn’t as tough as he likes to think he is, there are strange dogs who run across the property from time to time, and there are also coyotes in the area – and he doesn’t seem to understand the idea of keeping away from traffic. I’d absolutely hate to give up on keeping him in the yard only to have his stupid ass run out in traffic (we’re pretty close to the road here, and some cars go by really fast) or to have him venture into the back forty to be set upon by a coyote or six, or a stray dog. In the other house, we were unable to keep Fancypants contained, and he disappeared. (It’s been four years since Fancypants disappeared, by the way. Hard to believe – I still occasionally dream about him coming home!) I really want to do my best to keep him contained just to keep his stupid ass safe.
OK, here’s my “real” Friday question, prefaced by some ass-kissing (sincere, but ass-kissing nonetheless): I really admire you guys for living your lives exactly the way you want to — you seem to not let anyone dissuade you from staying home, taking care of cats, etc. (end ass-kissing). Do you ever feel like you want to be doing something different? Are you ever dissatisfied with your life? You seem remarkably angst-free and I’m just wondering if we never see it, or if you really are this serene about your life. If the latter, I’m jealous!
I have to say – and y’all might want to get out the barf bags, here – I really, really like my life. I like not working, I like being able to spend my day doing what I want to do, I like having time to can 63 million cans of green beans if I need to, and I like having the flexibility to drop everything and run to the pet store to cover for another volunteer if need be. I think Fred likes having me home, too – if he needs something, he just has to call and ask (which isn’t to say that I don’t act like a big baby and get pissy if he interrupts me, because I DO, I’m only human, y’know). Some people might get bored staying home, but I honestly can’t remember the last time I got bored; there’s always something to do; just sitting here right now, I can think of ten things that need to be done. Any angst I might feel is fairly temporary and usually hormone-driven. My only complaint is that I’m not a terribly organized person, and I can often end up wasting time that could be spent doing something more productive. There are about ten million things I’d like to have accomplished by now, six months after I moved into this house, that I haven’t even started.
I am extremely lucky that Fred’s job pays well enough that I don’t have to work, and I’m completely aware of how lucky I am that he’s intelligent and accomplished and people are willing to pay him very well for what he does. Obviously, if circumstances changed and I needed to go back to work, I would and I wouldn’t bitch (much) about it, but yeah – I love my life!
* * *
What is the difference between a torti and a calico? I thought they were the same thing.
That’s a good question! As I understand it (and if I’m wrong, someone out there correct me, please), the difference is that with calicos, their colors are big blocks of color, whereas in tortis, the colors are intermingled. I also believe that a true torti doesn’t have white – if she has white on her, she’s considered torti-and-white.
* * *
Not really a question related to your (very entertaining) site, but just curious if you know where the heck Bonnie (Cheesey-goodness) is?? I can’t find her website ANYWHERE!
Good question! I thought she moved to
Same Ol’ Thang, but a quick look gives me nothin’. Bonnie, where the hell are you?!?!
* * *
Why can’t the other cats go outside and only Mister Boogers stay inside?
‘Cause I’m totally NOT spending my day standing at the door letting the cats in and out – and Mister Boogers is a quick and wily bastard, and he would totally shoot out the door before I could catch him.
* * *
My daughter moved back home for awhile and on Sunday is bringing her two female cats (both about 1 1/2 years old) to live with us. My cat (female also and same age) already lives here. What is the best way to introduce them? What has worked best for you? Should I have her keep her 2 cats in her room and bathroom upstairs with the doors closed or just let them free? Anyway, since you have so many cats I know you’ll have a better answer than any of those Cat Fancy magazines. Thanks.
We’ve always just tossed cats together and let the fur fly, but I believe the conventional wisdom is to do it slowly – if you have room to keep the new cats closed off from the “old” cats, you can do that and let the cats sniff at each other under the doors for a week or so. Then, slowly introduce them with supervision – let them come face-to-face, sniff each other, maybe growl and hiss a little, then separate them. Do that for longer periods of time, culminating – in a day someone will be around all day – in letting all the cats roam through the house at will for the entire day. If that goes well, I’d just leave them out all the time – if it doesn’t, then I’d leave them out with supervision during the day, and then lock them up at night until things cool down.
* * *
Is anybody in Alabama doing anything about this? Any legal fights? Just wondering.
Sherri Williams, owner of Pleasures (a line of adult stores in the Huntsville area) is fighting the law. It appears – according to
this article –
In what proved to be a crucial oversight, none of the legislators (including the bill’s sponsor, Tom Butler) read the bill before voting unanimously to pass it. When the portion banning sex toys was later brought to Butler’s attention, he sheepishly responded that he had nothing, per se, against them. There’s apparently no support for the law, and at this point it doesn’t look like anyone’s planning on upholding that particular law.
* * *
Expect the receipt of marketing materials from Adam & Eve soon. I expect that they will increase their marketing to a new “exclusive” market for their toys.
Oddly enough, when I changed our mailing address on our magazine subscriptions, I changed the address our Playboy goes to, to the PO Box. I didn’t want it coming here to Smallville because, y’know, small town and all and I don’t necessarily want the maillady to discuss our magazine subscriptions with the neighbors (not that she would, but she might. You never know!). As soon as I started getting Playboy at the PO Box, I also started receiving mailings from Adam & Eve. I get about one mailing a week from them now, and I wonder if it’s got anything to do with the law banning the sale of sex toys?
* * *
Have you considered having Fred adapt one of the below products to use on ya’lls fence? Some of the angled ones might work. If I ever have a small fence (i.e. not 350+ft plus trees) I am planning on using one of the below so the kitties can go out.
Cat Fence-In
Do It Yourself Cat Fence
Affordable Cat Fence
Purrfect Cat Fence
Kitty Klips
I actually think that we’re going to give the Kitty Klips a try (and I keep reading that as “Kitty Lips”, by the way!). When Mister Boogers goes over the fence, he goes over the gate, and if there’s something there to deter him from climbing over the top, that might be all we need. The problem with the angled fence is that our fence posts are too far apart to support the weight on the top of the fence.
I should point out, too, that Fred thinks it might be a wire issue – the wire we used for the cat fence at the other house was thicker than the wire we’re using now, which may or may not mean that it’s not putting out as much electricity. It could be a matter of just needing to replace the wire. In any case, we’re not giving up just yet!
* * *
Is it only the sale of vibrators that’s illegal or did they make possession illegal too? I can just see the undercover agents lurking at corners trying to sell their wares in order to fill up your jails. Which are probably, just like in our state, totally overcrowded.
The law only bans the sale of vibrators, not the possession of them or (one hopes) the use of them – you can go up into Tennessee, for instance, buy a vibrator and bring it home. Right now there’s not really a concern that the fuzz will be pounding on the door of Alabamans saying “We hear an electronic buzzing in there! OPEN UP before we open fire!”, but it’s probably only a matter of TIME.
* * *
Maybe you could put Mister Boogers into a harness and on a leash. Of course he won’t like it, but that’s just too bad. He’d get used to it eventually.
Actually, before we put the fence around the yard (and when I say “We” put the fence around the back yard, I of course mean “Not me!”) we tried putting a harness on Mister Boogers and tying him out, but he’s a wily and wriggly bastard, and when we weren’t paying attention he slipped out of the harness and ran off, causing us much anguish because – I think I probably haven’t mentioned this – he’s a DOUCHEBAG.
* * *
So, how did you explain this big door knob bruise? Did you tell Fred that the intruder tried to subdue you but only got one blow in before you pistol whipped him unconscious, drug him out to the back forty, and promptly buried him?
Would you friggin’ believe that it didn’t leave a bruise at ALL? It hurts to touch, and by all rights I should have a great big black-and-blue mark, but nada. Not a thing. I think that when something hurts, it should totally LOOK like it hurts so that I can garner a great amount of sympathy. I’m not an easy bruiser, though, so no one can see my pain. ::SOB!::
* * *
So, how exactly does one break a litter box? I’m scratching my head over here but I can’t figure it out!
It helps if you’re a great big klutz and a dumbass to boot. What happened was that I have two litter box bottoms. When I clean out the litter box, I take the top off the litter box being used, dump the dirty litter from one box bottom into the other (there’s a strainer that sits in the empty box bottom), sift the litter for clumps, dump the clumps into a small trash bag, and then put the top back on the now-full box bottom. The other day there was a clump of litter stuck to the side of the box I was emptying, so I smacked the side of the litter box bottom so the clump would fall out into the trash bag, and when I smacked it, I also brought it down, hard, on the edge of the litter box bottom I was dumping the litter into, causing it to crack and rendering it unusable.
You can’t buy mad skillz like that, I’m telling you.
* * *
Have you ever taken prednisone? Is it common to get flaky taking it??
I have never taken prednisone myself, and I don’t remember hearing that people tend toward flakiness while on it – how about it? Anyone out there on the prednisone and getting flaky?
* * *
I love you guys entirely so don’t take this as an attack on you personally but what is it with Americans and guns??? Is it a living in the country thing, a living in the South thing, a life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness thing? Geez louise the last thing I would be doing is grabbing a gun to take into the garage regardless of the circumstances. A hockey stick yes but a gun no. Having said that here is a question for your Friday extravaganza…have you ever fired your gun, gone to a target range or whatever?
As far as I can tell, it’s a male thing. If it were left up to me, we wouldn’t have more guns than people in the house – in fact, I’d probably keep it down to one gun entirely rather than the several we actually own. I won’t deny that, living in the country, having a gun around makes me feel a little safer. We’ve had guns for about eight years now, and so far no one’s gotten shot, knock on wood!
I’m not sure how safe I’d have felt carrying a hockey stick into the garage with me – if there was someone in there with bad plans for me, I’m fairly certain that my waving a hockey stick around would have made him laugh before he grabbed the end of it and beat me to death with it. On the other hand, pointing a gun at him would likely have stopped him in his tracks. Given that there’s a known crack addict thief who likes to mosey slowly by our house quite frequently, having a gun made me feel safer.
We regularly visit a local target range, I’m confident that I could shoot to stop someone who was coming at me in a threatening manner, and I know how to load, unload, and clean my pistol – all of which are things that anyone who owns a gun should know how to do.
* * *
Tommy looks a little portly for that thing- he looks kind of cramped.
Like most cats, Tommy ADORES trying to squeeze into places that are too small for him. If I put a teacup in the middle of the floor, he’d probably be trying to wedge his ass into it in before sixty seconds have passed.
* * *
Have you added to your cat egg collection to represent the additional cats (grey, black, etc.) you have added to your family?
Actually, no. In fact, I ended up getting rid of most of them because they were cluttering up the house. I only kept the orange tabby one because I liked it the most.
* * *
Do you ever wanna go running and screaming with your pubes on fire, right the hell outta this freakin’ bible belt?
Running and screaming out of the bible belt? Yes. Pubes on fire? Not so much, because the smell of burning hair makes me nauseous.
* * *
I am having issues in my dry county of people preaching the lawd and saying Red Lobster will bring out heathens in the street, drunken and buying sex toys I am sure! They forget we already have 5 private clubs for that. Sheesh. I didn’t know Red Lobster was the place to go to get drunk and dance on the tables did you?
I had NO IDEA Red Lobster was such a den of heathenry. I am absolutely going to have to visit Red Lobster, and soon!
* * *
OK, I missed the Q&A. I have 3 strays that I caught, and they are about 6 months old. (We fixed and released the feral mama.) They are now in my garage. The boys are really sweet, but the girl is still skittish. I’ve made just a little progress, but she still is freaked when I try to grab her. I tried unsuccessfully to catch her last night and this morning to take her to get spayed. Am I going to have to borrow another trap to catch her in my own damn garage? I don’t think I can catch her to isolate her, either, as you’ve found to work.
Also, what are your thoughts on just fixing the girl? Releasing them? (I had three strays last year, two of which I kept because shelters were full and none of my ads panned out. I have 6 and can’t keep any more.) Two are solid white, and I’d think that they were less able to hide from prey. And the cold months are coming up. That was definitely on my mind while my other cat was missing. It froze a few times. Also, we already have 3 strays that are outside and are “not our cats.”
It sounds like you
are going to need to use a trap to catch her again, which is quite the pisser, isn’t it? You might want to give Miss Pink’s idea a try to calm her down:
Take a terry cloth washcloth, the thin ones, and get it wet with warm water and then wrap part of it around your finger like when you clean your ears in the shower, and then when you are with the kittens, just PIN one with one hand and start ’scrubbing’ their face with the cloth-wrapped finger. Gently of course.
Believe it or not, this mirrors what their mom would do to wash them and calm them, so instead of making them feel trapped and freaked, they just totally put up with being scrubbed.
You don’t pin them down hard, it’s just that you don’t do it by picking them up and holding them, just pin them where they are. They will shake their head and walk away and finish washing their faces and from then on out, they will start to think you are the Mom-Lady who gives them a tongue-bath and not a bad sort of demon, after all.
I do this with any cat I get when they are a kitten, and it makes it so you can handle their faces and lips and clean out their ears all their lives because they think it is a mom-love action.
As far as just fixing them and letting them go – honestly, if you can’t find homes for them and there’s no shelter in your area that will help, I don’t see any other choice, and I can’t find fault with the idea. It would be one thing if they were pets and you wanted to send them off into the wild to live, but these kittens were born and (so far) raised outside, much like our Newt, who absolutely refuses to come inside. That might not be a popular opinion – and it might be a surprising opinion from some one who’s spending so much energy to keep Mister “Douchebag” Boogers quarantined from the rest of the world, but as I see it, you either fix and release them, or have them put to sleep, right?
* * *
Didn’t Fred say he was busy planting bushes? Was he planting your “privacy” foliage outside your kitchen window? What did you end up planting?
Yeah, he was planting our privacy foliage, because I decided it was time to get it DONE – hopefully there’ll be some growing before the weather gets too cold for it! We got three Butterfly Bushes and two Rose of Sharons. He planted them so that the Rose of Sharons are in one row, and the Butterfly Bushes are staggered in a second row.
* * *
SO I would LOVE to know how you feel about illegal immigrants.
This is one of the MANY topics I can see both sides of. On the one hand, I think if people are going to immigrate to the US, they need to do it legally. On the other hand, I understand that’s a difficult process, and if you want to come to this country to make a better life for your family, it seems easier to enter the country illegally (and yes, I know there’s nothing “easy” about paying a coyote money you can ill afford to help you make the arduous and dangerous journey across the border, often dying in the process). I mostly think that if you’re going to live in this country, you need to learn the language (if I were to immigrate to France, I promise you it would be my number one goal to learn French as quickly as possible), because it pisses me off to go into the grocery store and see shampoo that has only Spanish writing on it, no English at all. (I should confess that I’ve considered taking Spanish classes, because it REALLY bothers me to not know what it says on those stupid shampoo bottles.)
In high school, the spud told me that a friend had pissed her off because he “doesn’t like Mexicans.” When I asked why, she said “Because he says they come to our country and take our jobs!”, and I said “Well, really, the truth is that they come to our country and do the jobs no one else wants to do.”
Probably, question asker, you were looking for a more heated and definitive answer about my feelings on the subject, but I don’t have a clear and straightforward opinion on the subject – my opinion changes with the weather, it seems – so there you go.
* * *
When you say “my entire family reads” your journal time to time does that mean mom and dad too?
Yes.
* * *
But seriously….how is the skinny sex? Any different than the pre surgery sex?
* * *
So, the kittens that I just got Tuesday? Off they go, to the pet store later this morning! That was a fast turnaround, and too bad – I really like those girls. They’re sweet, playful, enjoy being petted, like to kick the ass of the occasional toy mouse, and so very soft and silky. I think they’re going to find homes FAST.
I don’t think it’s possible to take a bad picture of Elle.
Elle and Felicia.
Dulcinea and Skittles, hiding under the dresser.
Punki REALLY likes that mouse.
********************************
Proof that if you whine long enough and annoy everyone around you, you’ll eventually get what you want:
“I gots me a snuggle.”
“It’s NOT a snuggle, it’s just sharing the same bed.”
“I gots me a SNUGGLE!”
“It’s NOT a snuggle, I’m barely even touching you!”
“I gots me a snugglllllllllllllllle!”
“It’s NOT a snuggle… Oh, shut UP.”
* * *
Previously
2006: The rags used on that closet: ONE MEELLION.
2005: And then the last straw came along and broke the fat woman’s back.
2004: Because he’s a skinny bastard.
2003: No entry.
2002: No entry.
2001: Day One.
2000: So obviously I don’t know nothing’ ’bout picking out no paint.]]>