Regarding the bathroom reading: I think what y’all are misunderstanding, you non-bathroom readers, is that I don’t sit in there for HOURS and read. I’m generally in there for less than two minutes (estimated; I don’t time myself, FREAKS) and read a page or two while in there. If whatever I’m reading is compelling enough … Continue reading “3/31/08”

Regarding the bathroom reading: I think what y’all are misunderstanding, you non-bathroom readers, is that I don’t sit in there for HOURS and read. I’m generally in there for less than two minutes (estimated; I don’t time myself, FREAKS) and read a page or two while in there. If whatever I’m reading is compelling enough (ie, NOT The Washingtonienne) I might read to the end of the chapter. Which is why it took so long to finish The Washingtonienne, despite being a relatively quick reader. I’d read a page or two of the book and have no desire to keep on reading.

And now I’m going to shut up about my bathroom habits, because you already know more than you ever wanted to know about that particular subject. YOU’RE WELCOME.

PS: According to Friday’s poll, 69% of Bitchypoo readers (who took the poll) read in the bathroom.

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While in the bathroom yesterday, BRUSHING MY TEETH, I glanced down at the bottle of lotion sitting next to the sink. On the front was a proud proclamation that the lotion contains Shea and Cocoa Butters.

Shea Butters would be an excellent stripper name.

For that matter, Cocoa Butters would work pretty well, too.

“Annnnnnnd NOW welcome to the back stage, twin sisters Shea and Cocoa Butters!”

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Stuff White People Like got a book deal. That is for SURE one of the blogger-books I’ll be buying, because that site just cracks me UP.

(Note to myself: Update links page.)

(Reply note from myself to myself: Yeah, I’ll get right on that.)

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So I had my consultation with the plastic surgeon on Friday. I mentioned, perhaps, once or twice or six thousand times, that I was NOT looking forward to this appointment, didn’t I? Not because I thought the surgeon would be an ass or anything (this surgeon comes highly recommended by other local women who’ve had weight loss surgery – he’s considered the best at what he does AND has a good bedside manner, is what they say) but the idea of standing fatly naked in front of a strange man is never an appealing one.

It went fine, though. Once the surgeon came in and introduced himself, the fact that I was sitting there covered in thin paper garments (and a classy string bikini provided by the nurse!) didn’t really bother me. I figured, this guy’s seen a lot of naked women who want to have their saggy skin removed, I don’t have anything he hasn’t seen before, what the fuck, let it all hang out. Despite the fact that I was standing there mostly naked in front of the surgeon, the nurse, and Fred (who has possibly seen me naked once or twice), I wasn’t self-conscious in the slightest.

The surgeon had the good sense to be good looking, but not so good looking that I was super-aware of it, making me self-conscious. He definitely has a good bedside manner, and spent plenty of time making sure that I understood how each surgery was done and what the possible complications would be.

Almost more important than a doctor’s manner is his support staff, and I have to say that this guy’s got a really good staff. No one seemed rushed or brusque, and the nurse was careful to make sure that I was comfortable and covered at all times despite the fact that I was okay with being mostly uncovered.

I wish like hell I could remember how the surgeon termed it when he was looking at my backside, because both Fred and I translated it in our heads into “You have a nice ass.” Something about how I had good volume or it wasn’t saggy or something. He also said that I have good skin tone on my face, and I didn’t have the signs of aging he’d expect to see in someone my age, like the brackets around my mouth or… something else. Fuck if I remember. In any case, he made it clear enough that I looked youngish for my age that I wanted to ask just how old he thought I was, because I think I totally look mid-40s. Maybe he was just buttering me up.

During the entire exam, I was very, very careful not to look at Fred because I knew that if I did, it would be ALL over, because we’d start snickering like frat boys. He said he started laughing once or twice, but managed to get it under control.

So where we stand now is that I’m waiting to hear back from the surgeon’s office with a quote for the lower body lift (belt lipectomy – some lower body lifts include thigh lifts, but mine won’t; I might be interested in that at a later date, but not at this point) and unless the price is far more than we expect, they’ll submit to the insurance company for partial coverage. It’ll take 4 – 6 weeks to hear back from them, and depending on the surgeon’s operating schedule, I don’t see anything happening until the end of May, beginning of June at least.

There’s a more detailed write-up of the visit to the plastic surgeon over at OneFatBitchypoo, if you’re interested.

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Boy, this weekend went by fast. I didn’t do a lot on Saturday, just cleaned and straightened the house, put away the 60 pounds of bird seed I ordered online (I like to use no-waste bird seed and I can get it cheaper online, but the box is heavy as hell, so it takes me a few days to summon the energy to lug the bags over to the garage), checked on the chicks, spent time with the foster kittens, and took a short nap.

I talked to my sister Saturday night for an hour or so, and we confessed our ADD tendencies to each other. Neither of us, it appears, can just sit and do one thing at a time while sitting in front of the computer; we both have like 16 windows open, do one thing for a few minutes, switch to something else, switch to yet another thing, and so on. This would probably explain why it takes so long to write an entry, because I can’t just sit and write it, I’ve got to write some, flit off to another window and then another, and then think “What was I doing… oh, right!” and write a little more before the ugly cycle begins anew.

(Right now, I have six windows open. That would make a good ending to each entry, a confession of how many windows I have open, and a link to each page.)

After I got off the phone, Fred and I watched the first hour of The Assassination of Jesse James (a movie I enjoyed more than Fred did – and I reiterate that Casey Affleck has got the flattest, deadest eyes I’ve ever seen), spent time with the foster kittens, and then went to bed. (We finished watching the movie last night. I thought it was interesting; Fred thought it was less so, but he at least watched the whole thing with me, bless his heart.)

We live the high life, we do.

Sunday morning I was up fairly early. I’ve instituted a new rule for myself – I have to scoop the litter boxes, clean up the kitchen, and take a shower before I sit down in front of the computer, because it turns into such a time suck sometimes that I don’t get my ass into the shower until late morning, and I always feel like I’ve wasted half the day away. So I got all my morning stuff done (though I did cheat and check my email, but I did it from a standing position SO IT DOESN’T COUNT), put laundry in, and then made my grocery list and headed off to get groceries.

I was gone about an hour to get groceries (I drive the 15 minutes to Yuppiesville to visit the good grocery store; we’ll be getting our own good grocery store hopefully in the next few months), then I got home, put them away, ate breakfast, did laundry. I puttered around on the computer for a little while longer, then changed into my “work” clothes and headed upstairs with my supplies.

We have two white bookcases that Fred’s father made for him as a birthday gift years ago. I don’t know exactly how old they are, but Fred owned them before I moved down here, so it’s been 12 years or so. They’re painted white and over time the paint has yellowed and there are marks on the bookcases that won’t come off. One of the bookcases is in the garage, so the fact that it’s a little marked up isn’t an issue. The other one is in the guest bedroom, and I decided that it was time to repaint it.

It took me about an hour and a half to repaint it, but it certainly looks much better (sorry, I didn’t think to take pictures).

Once that was done, I went off to run errands – recycling center, returning a couple of movies, the dollar store – then by the time I got home, it was time for lunch.

Lunch, snuggling with foster kittens, checking to see what Fred was doing, looking at the chicks, and the next thing I knew, it was time to make dinner.

Dinner (steak and salad), more foster kitten quality time, a little more time in front of the computer, and then it was time to watch TV.

Next thing I know it’s bed time, and the weekend is over.

Why can’t all weekends be three days long, maybe four? I mean, yeah – every day’s a weekend day for ME, but I sure do like having Fred around. He’s always got something interesting going on and if I get bored I can track him down and let him entertain me.

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The foster kitties are improving, bit by bit. Smudgie has gotten to the point where she’ll come out and be petted and ask for love every second or third time I go in the room. HG will come over and sniff and lick my hand, but he’s still not up for a good vigorous petting session – in fact, he’s got a one-pet-only policy that I honor because I don’t want to scare him off.

He spends a lot of time watching Smudgie to see her reaction or what she’s going to do. If he doesn’t come around in the next few days, I’m probably going to separate them – put him in the guest bedroom by himself – to see if splitting them up changes their level of friendliness. Obviously if they’re miserable apart or they don’t get friendlier, we’ll reunite them.

I let Tommy in to visit with them Saturday afternoon, and they were very interested in him, followed him around and sniffed at him. They’ve been well socialized with other cats, obviously, because there was no hissing or spitting or fluffing on their part (maybe a couple of small hisses, but that’s it). I’ve never seen foster kittens react so well to new cats.

They’re such sweet little things; I hope they warm up soon.

Note that he’s carefully watching her to see what she’s going to do next!

HG poses prettily.

“Tryin’ to eat here, lady.”


Sugarbutt and his dry, scabby nose. (It has since improved and is back to pink perfection!)


Windows currently open: 6. Gmail, Google Reader, LL Bean, MSN Lifestyle, and a blog I won’t link, because it’s kind of boring (not one of my regular reads, and don’t worry – it’s not one of you!).

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2007: No entry.
2006: It was so friggin’ cute I made Fred listen to it, too.
2005: I have my finger on the pulse of pop culture, apparently.
2004: A day in the life.
2003: What makes me crazy.
2002: No entry.
2001: No entry.
2000: Okay, enough of the wallowing.