Every year right before the holiday, I get a bug up my ass and decide there’s something I absolutely MUST HAVE, cannot WAIT to have it, it MUST be in my possession before the holiday.
One year, I was desperate to find matching serving dishes so that when Fred’s family came for breakfast all the serving dishes would match, even though they truly do not care about the matchiness of my serving dishes, I assure you. I went from store to store to store, looking for decent dishes at a reasonable price, and I think I ended up buying a bunch of plain white bowls and serving platters at Big Lots. We used them that once, and they’ve sat up in the cupboard ever since. But, hey – I’ve got ’em if I need ’em, right?
This year, the bug up my ass is a desire for a dark-green (Christmas green!) blanket. We’re intending to get a good Christmas picture for next year’s cards (I think I mentioned I’m planning to make cards by hand for next year’s card exchange. Me + construction paper + glue + cat pictures = HILARITY ENSUING, I’m sure.), and suddenly I decided that nothing but a dark green blanket as a background would do. NOTHING BUT DARK GREEN DO YOU HEAR ME?!
So yesterday I went to Target and PetSmart and I also went to Michael’s and Bed, Bath and Beyond, and I also went to Big Lots, and guess what? Not a single goddamn dark green blanket to be found ANYWHERE. Apparently dark green is not in fashion this year.
Finally, I snapped to my senses, realized I was being a dumbass, and bought a green blanket that was NOT dark green, but certainly green enough, and seriously, who gives a shit how green the background is? Y’all will be looking at the CAT, believe me.
Target, three days before Christmas? Surprisingly, not too bad. The parking lot was packed and I expected it to be a madhouse inside, but as long as I stayed away from the toy and electronics section, it was fine. I even spent a good long time browsing through the Christmas decorations, and there was hardly anyone there.
Bed, Bath and Beyond, on the other hand, what a fucking nightmare. Some ASSFACE even cut in front of me, but all I did was sputter quietly to myself and roll my eyes at the guy in line behind me.
CLEARLY I am filled with the Christmas spirit.
OH. I almost forgot. You know what? If you’re going walk around Target wearing a sweater that has some sort of flashing light on the front of it, said flashing light located directly between your breasts, guess what? PEOPLE ARE GOING TO GLANCE AT THE FLASHING LIGHT.
Don’t fucking give me A LOOK like I’m trying to get a look at your rack, lady, because guess what? It’s NOT THAT IMPRESSIVE.
Also, fuck you.
(Like I said, imbued with the Christmas spirit am I.)
Oh, Elayyyyyyyyne….
Refer to your comment from Saturday the 12th if you don’t remember this request – you said I think we should come up with song lyrics that you (AND FRED) have to act out photographically with cat props. It could be a fundraising thing for the shelter – I’ll donate $10 for you to post a picture of “Wonk’s* to the left of me, Cookies to the right/Here I am, stuck in the middle with Poo.”
Your wish, my command. Kinda. Fred’s not in the picture, but he TOOK the picture, so I’m proclaiming your wish fulfilled. 🙂
Wonk’s to the left of me
Cookies to the right
Here I am, stuck in the middle with Poo.
(Plus, a bonus Blues Brother thrown in there!)
Click here to see the large version to verify that, indeed, all four Wonkas are to my left, all five Cookies are to the right, and Miz Poo is, indeed, stuck in the middle with me. Or I with her. Whichever.
You may make your donation at your leisure. 😀
Yesterday, CatFancy asked if I put up Christmas decorations. I have put up Christmas decorations in the past, but when it became clear that we were going to have 20 (!) cats running around the house this holiday season, I opted not to put up decorations at all. I love Christmas trees and Christmas lights, but I couldn’t stand the idea of having to continually right the tree or chase down ornament the cats had knocked off the tree and kicked to the other end of the house, so no. No decorations this year.
However, I’ve come to realize that they make a “half” tree that you can hang on the wall and put lights and ornaments on, so I’m thinking that that’s going to be the way I go as far as decorating next year!
Pardon the HORRIBLE lighting on these pictures. Some day I’m actually going to read (and put into practice) those “how to use your digital camera” books that are sitting on the bookcase.
You can’t see the feather toy, but rest assured that that’s what they were all looking at, and what Gus was jumping for.
I love this one because it looks like Veruca’s riding on Jake’s back, doing circus tricks.
GOT IT!
So close!
She’s walking on sunshine!
My absolute favorite shot. Not only because of Gus and the outstretched paw, but also look in the lower right of the picture. See that deranged grin on Jake’s face? It cracks me UP.
“Whatchoo MEAN ‘stuck in the middle with Poo’?! I THOUGHT YOU LIKED HAVING ME HERE, BLOCKING YOUR VIEW OF THE MONITOR!”
Previously
2008: It’s nice to have a clean house. I should probably try it more often!
2007: The eyes of a lover, the heart of a monster the world has never seen before.
2006: No entry.
2005: I have the best readers EVAH!
2004: Gotta love that Jack Bauer.
2003: When it’s such a noteworthy event that my child stops and stares in wonder, it’s possible I’m just not cleaning often enough, ya think?
2002: No entry.
2001: No entry.
2000: No entry.
1999: That’s my girl!