did take today off. What the heck’s the use of working for your husband if you can’t take advantage of it every now and then? Tomorrow, though, I’ll be back at work bright-eyed and bushy-tailed (and coughing up lungmeat).

Thanks to everyone who made my birthday special with the thoughtful e-cards. You know who you are. For my birthday, I received an amazon.com gift certificate from my parents, an amazon.com gift certificate from my grandmother (with help from my dad, I’m sure), and a kick-ass alarm clock from Fred. "Alarm clock?!" you’re bellowing in horror. "He gave you an alarm clock?" Hush up, now. It was an expensive alarm clock, and one that I asked for specifically. It plays cds, and at the touch of a button, you can listen to the soothing sounds of the ocean, a forest stream, or wind (which coincidentally sounds like static). I intend to set it 15 minutes early tomorrow morning and wake slowly to the sounds of the ocean. Ahhhhh.

For dinner, we ordered from Allen’s, which is one of the fine establishments from which The Restaurant Connection delivers. Neither of us was in any shape to cook, so I took a raincheck on my very favorite meal – steak, shrimp and oysters a la Fred – and we ordered out. I got the shrimp po’ boy, which was pretty good despite the fact that it fell apart every time I picked it up. Oh, I just hate that. "Why do they make a sandwich that falls apart like that?" I whined to Fred. In his narcotic cough syrup-induced haze, he nodded sympathetically and hacked a big green chunk of lung onto his plate.

Just kidding!

After dinner, Fred and the spud brought out the cupcakes they’d bought at the grocery store the day before, and stuck a candle in one of them. It was pretty cute. I made my wish and blew out the candle. And whattaya know, my wish came true: I awoke this morning feeling so much better! The spud presented me with a card – all about farts, it was, and pretty damn funny. I loves me a good fart joke.

Ah, well. Y’all have a good night now, y’hear?