1. If you could build your house anywhere, where would it be? The coast of Maine. Preferably on an island off the coast of Maine. And then I’d have a winter home on the coast of Florida… 2. What’s your favorite article of clothing? My favorite article of clothing to wear would be my oversized, sloppy-ass sweatpants that Fred owned at his largest. I look like a clown in them (and I don’t go out in public in them, either). My most flattering article of clothing would be one of my new underwire bras, because they liiiiiiiiift and seeeeeeeeeparate in a most flattering way. 3. What’s your favorite physical feature of the opposite sex? Give me a guy with a great smile any day. And a nice butt. 4. What’s the last CD that you bought? An Olivia Newton-John Greatest Hits cd. 5. Where’s your favorite place to be? Laying on the bed talking with Fred. Listening to the minutiae of the spud’s day. Or in the chair in the corner of the bedroom while everyone else is asleep, reading whatever it is I’m reading, with a candle burning, a cat on the back of the chair, and another on my lap. 6. Where’s your least favorite place to be? In an exam room at my gynecologist’s, wrapped in a skimpy top and skimpier paper lap blanket thingy, waiting for her to mosey on in. 7. What’s your favorite place to be massaged? My back and shoulders, unless you’re trying to get some looooovin’. 8. HEY, what happened to #8? Katie stole it and won’t give it back. 9. What time do you wake in the morning? The alarm goes off every morning at 7:25, but Fred generally wakes me up around 7 for my morning hug and kiss before he leaves for work. I doze back off until the alarm goes off, and then either get up to exercise, lay in bed and pet Miz Poo, or doze off until 8, depending on what I need to do during the day. Yes indeedy, it IS a rough life. This morning I was up at 7, though, if that makes y’all feel any better. 10. What’s your favorite TV show? Friends. I’ve seen every one of the shows at least twice. I’m also becoming mighty fond of Bernie Mac and Malcolm in the Middle. And then of course there are all my beloved reality shows. 11. What’s your favorite kitchen appliance? The spud. She’s a multi-use kitchen appliance, who puts the dishes in the dishwasher, chops the occasional carrot, and makes her own lunch. Everyone should have a spud! Six easy payments of $199,995.95! 12. What’s your favorite childhood memory? My family and I were driving somewhere (most likely we were driving from Michigan to California – 4 kids ranging from the age of 4 to 12 in the back of a station wagon – can you feel the joy?), and we stopped overnight in a motel. We were all in the same room, it was bedtime, and someone started up with the "Goodnight, John-Boy!" "Goodnight, Mary-Ellen!", and it probably only went on for a few minutes, but in my memory it seems like hours, with all of us laughing the entire time. 13. What makes you laugh? Those damn cats make me laugh my ass off rather frequently. Ain’t nothin’ funnier than a startled cat. 14. What makes you really angry? When people take it upon themselves to judge someone they don’t really know and send him excuse-filled emails telling him what an awful woman-hater he is. And when other people send awful emails to those I care about, trying to bring them down, under the stupid-ass guise of "Keepin’ it real! Letting you know how it really is! So give up and curl in a corner, please, so I can go smugly along with my life without knowing that the reason I’m failing is because of me. Thankssomuch." Ahem. Cruelty to animals, too. 15. If you could play any instrument what would it be? The geee-tar. No, the piano. I’m so musically uninclined that I can’t even imagine ever being able to play anything. Oh, drums! I pick drums. I bet I could pound some serious drums, man. 16. Favorite Restaurant/Cafe/Eatery? It all depends on what I feel like eating. The spud and I had been in the habit of visiting Applebee’s a couple of times a month, but we recently stopped going there, because Fred’s sister’s husband’s daughter (got that?) is a waitress there, and I have a real dislike of being waited on by someone I know, even someone I barely know. Give me strangers, please. 17. Scariest moment of your life? The day the spud was born, after I woke up. The ex brought her in to see me, and put her down next to me. I thought "My god, what the fuck have I done? I can’t be a MOTHER!" It was a moment of absolute paralyzing "I’m going to fuck this up bad!" terror. 18. If a movie was made about you, what current/former Hollywood star would portray you? In my dreams: Ashley Judd. In reality: Roseanne. Your suggestions? (Which one of you yahoos is going to suggest John Candy?) 19. Do you believe in afterlife? Yes. 20. Favorite children’s book? The Little House books. I saved up my allowance diligently until I got each and every one of the series. I still have them, and I think they’re the only books I still have from my childhood. They were the first books I bought for myself, aside from comic books, and I’ll always have a warm spot in my heart for them. 21. What is your favorite season? Spring. It’s the season of daffodils, and I love watching everything turn green and come to life. Coming in a distant second would be Fall. 22. What is your least favorite household chore? Um… everything? Cleaning out the litter box is the worst, I guess, followed by dusting, which I hardly ever do. 23. If you could have one super power, what would it be? I’d be invisible. It would go along well with my incredibly nosy nature. 24. If you had a tattoo, what would it be? Either a smiley face or a Tweety Bird on my hip. 25. Who was your first love & at what age? If we’re talking about puppy love, his name was John, and I was 16. If we’re talking about true love, his name is Fred, and I was 28. 26. The song you wished you’d written? I Will Always Love You, ’cause Whitney made Dolly an assload of money with her rendition of it, even though the Dolly version is tons better. 28. What’s in the trunk of your car? A super-size bottle of windex, to refill the bottles in the house. I got it at Sam’s about a month ago, but we haven’t needed it yet. Usually I drive around with a big thing o’ kitty litter back there too, but not at the moment. 29. Of the people you emailed this to, who is most likely to respond? n/a 30. Who is the least likely to respond? n/a 31. What is your favorite day? Friday, ’cause the weekend is close at hand, and I don’t have to exercise or watch what I eat. It’s my free day! 32. Using only 1 word describe yourself: Doofus. 33. Say one nice thing about the person that sent this to you. Katie is a rockin’ cutie, with excellent Bold and the Beautiful insights.]]>
02/19/2002