Go read about my Saturday night trip to the emergency room in the diet journal. (So many of you read both journals that I didn’t want to repeat the whole story in this journal)

On the cover of the most recent US Weekly: EXCLUSIVE – Meg’s In Love. After a tough divorce and the Russell Crowe mess, Meg Ryan falls hard for a younger man.

Okay, you know what? I DON’T BELIEVE you, US! You said it was love when she was with Anthony Edwards! You swore it was true love when she was married to Dennis Quaid! You promised that she was in big, bad love with Russell Crowe! Now you’re saying she’s fallen hard for a younger man? LIARS. You’ve burned me too many times, I’m just going put my hands over my eyes and hum a happy tune.

Wait. Is that Craig Bierko? CRAIG BIERKO AIN’T NO YOUNGER MAN. Page 38…

Oh. My. God. Call the men in the white coats. Meg Ryan is dating someone three years younger! For the love of god, what is this world coming to?!

Jeezus. She’s 40 years old and dating a 37 year-old. Since when the hell is that really "younger"? I mean, technically, yes, but by all the rules of Hollywood, where Catherine Zeta-Jones-Douglas-Die-Bitch-Die has to change the diaper of the child she had with the elderly Michael Douglas and then turn around and change the diaper Michael’s wearing, this is just not NEWSWORTHY. Give me a motherfucking break. I was hoping to see that Meg was the reason Britney and Justin broke up (but did they? They’re denying it, so it must be true). I’d like to see a nice Macaulay Culkin/ Meg Ryan pairing – THAT would be a reason for blaring the "younger man" thing, not freakin’ 3-years-younger Craig Bierko.

Obviously, I need to be the managing editor at US.

Meg Ryan sure does have a gummy smile, doesn’t she?

Oh, and while I’m bitching about Hollywood, I’ll mention that Fred and I watched Joy Ride last week. Steve Zahn just cracked me up, and the movie wasn’t bad, though it dragged a little, but I’ve come to the conclusion that I really don’t like Leelee Sobieski. Something about her face or voice annoys the shit out of me. I want to like her, really I do, but I can’t. I hate her!

I finally got around to watching the ER I taped last week. It was a rerun, but it happened to be one of the few I hadn’t already seen – the one where Luka and Abby break up, and Benton finds out that Carla’s been killed in a car accident.

Luka – whom I loved and adored after he did that entire Hamlet monologue in Croatian last week, yeah baby – pissed me off when he told Abby to stop being a bitch because "You’re not that pretty and you’re not that special." Damn, why she didn’t just melt into his arms is beyond me. I think she’s that pretty, personally, and I’d like to kick Luka’s ass for saying such a thing.

I was reminded again how very much I don’t miss Benton in the slightest little bit. He was the dullest character on any show I’ve ever seen. If he ever exhibited the slightest spark of personality, I managed to miss it – and I’ve seen almost every single episode. I couldn’t stand his deadpan, blank-faced delivery, and was happy to fast-forward past his scenes last night.

Good riddance to boring characters, I say.