This is only the breast. Granted, the breast is the biggest part of the turkey, but can you imagine what this guy looked like when he was still alive? They must have pumped hormones into him every 10 seconds – there are entire turkeys smaller than this breast. Looking at this hormone-laden piece of meat makes me… well, it makes me kinda drool, actually. I basted it with Brummel and Brown (for that buttery taste!), and tossed Old Bay and Italian Herb seasoning on it willy-nilly, rather than ruuuuubbing it into the skin. I can’t stand to touch raw meat – remind me to tell the story about the Thanksgiving when Debbie and I were responsible for stuffing the turkey – and it’s not because it was once a living thing or anything. It’s because I can almost see the salmonella running off the meat and running wild across the counters with the sole intent of making me ill from food poisoning. Apparently Fred feels the same way, because when I set the turkey breast on the counter to partially thaw last night (yes, I KNOW you’re supposed to thaw it in the refrigerator, but there’s no way it would have been thawed enough by today to cook it), the frost on the package melted, and Fred said “You’ve got a big pool of salmonella making a run for my bowl of popcorn.” Heh. Anyway, the turkey’s smelling really good right now, and I’m thinking I’ll have to use the leftovers to make some turkey soup for dinner one of these nights. I’d invite y’all – I’m sure there’ll be plenty – but Himself would probably not look kindly upon such a thing. * * * So, now that Athena received the package I sent her last week, I can show you a picture of the funniest damn stuffed lobster I’ve ever seen: I found this guy when we were in Boothbay Harbor – I went into the store to see if they had any stuffed lobsters, because Athena’s baby Ty has an ocean-themed room, and no ocean-themed anything is complete without a stuffed lobster. When I saw this lobster, I fell in love so completely that not only did I buy one for Ty, but I also bought one for ME. (I also bought Ty and his big brother Aidan matching t-shirts with grinning moose mooses meese on them, but forgot to snap a pic.) His name is Looney Lobster, and he’s made by Fiesta� , but I couldn’t find a link where y’all could buy one for yourselves, sorry. You’ll just have to live with that seething jealousy in your hearts, I guess. * * * For some reason, the master bathroom is a popular hangout for spiders. They weave their webs, sit grumpily in them for a day or three, and then move on when they realize that the bathroom isn’t exactly Bug Central. Earlier today, before I vacuumed them up, there were no less than three abandoned fuzz-filled spider webs in the bathroom, and that’s just in the last week. I can understand why they’d set up shop near the downstairs window, the one with the cat door in it, because some kind of bug or another is always trying to sneak into the house there, but in the bathroom? I don’t see it. Considering how many spiders I run across in the house each day, I’m amazed that I was ever scared of them. At this point, I look at them to make sure they’re not poisonous, and if they aren’t (and I haven’t seen a poisonous one yet) I let them go about their business. Sure, if I’m vacuuming or wiping down the baseboards, I suck them up or grab them with my dustrag, but if they’re not in the way and as long as they keep their webs relatively clean – no fuzzies or bug parts hanging around – I could care less. They’re pretty small spiders for the most part – it would probably be a different story if one of those HUGE ones with big, fat bodies showed up next to my desk. Speaking of bugs, while I was in Maine, after we all went out to eat one night, I walked into my parents’ kitchen to see the most ADORABLE little bug sitting next to their sink. It was so cute, sitting there with it’s little antennae waving around as it tried to figure out what planet it had ended up on, that I turned to my father and said “What kind of bug is THAT?” My father looked closely at it, shrugged, and said “Just a bug.” And SQUISHED it with his finger. Poor cute little bug. * * * When I was running around looking for Tubby so I could take the picture for the Theme Thursday yesterday (and for the record, I thought it WAS Thursday yesterday, that’s why I put the picture in my entry), I got some other pretty good pictures I must share. I know you’re amazed – “Cat pictures?!” you’re exclaiming with shock and wonderment, “She NEVER shows us any cat pictures!” Well, there’s always a first time. Doesn’t she look pleased? Spanky’s favorite spot – on the chair in the corner of my room, snuggled under the pillow. He’ll spend all day there sometimes. Another shot of the faaaaabulous Tuberella.]]>