I was a kid, I’d never have dared to slump into the room where my mother was and whine "I’m so boooooored", because she’d sure as shit find something for me to do, and believe you me, it would have been something like cleaning the bathroom or vacuuming. Speaking of kids, our neighbors have 3 young boys, and the youngest is, well, very young (I’m not very good at telling the approximate age of young children). Young enough to still be on the occasional bottle, in any case, and he’s the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen. I saw him a few days after we moved in as I was getting the mail, and he gave me the cutest, flirty little smile. Right now, the boys next door have friends over, and they’re riding their bikes around the cul-de-sac (except for the littlest boy), and he’s trying to be helpful by picking up the cones they were riding their bikes around. Heh, it just started raining, and the kiddies are milling about in panic, screaming at the top of their lungs. Thankyajeezus that it didn’t start raining while I was walking 15 miles this morn. So I was in the bathroom this morning after my shower, and I caught sight of an old People magazine sitting on the toilet tank. (Yeah riiiight, like you don’t read in the bathroom… My current bathroom read is a Danielle Steel novel, which is about where it belongs, I think. Okay, that was rude. I actually like the book, god help me, even though I gave up reading Danielle Steel novels years ago because her editors seem to be scared to, y’know, EDIT her. But I digress) This particular issue was the one where it says at the top something like "Harrison Ford reunites with wife!", and I got a little happy feeling and thought "Good, I’m glad he did." I’m odd in that when someone gets married, whether they’re famous or not, I’m sincerely happy for them and hope they stay married forever and ever. When I hear that a couple is splitting up, I’m disappointed and wish they could work it out. Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman? Damn, I thought they’d be together forever. Meg Ryan and Dennis Quaid? I thought for sure they would have worked it out! Pamela And3rson and Tommy Lee? I was looking forward to seeing them still together in their sixties. Seriously! And don’t even get me started on Julia and Ben. And yet, when a couple breaks up, I’m absolutely consumed with curiosity to know why. Why did Tom and Nicole break up? Just tell us, Tom! Was it because you had the hots for Penelope Cruz, because you’re gay, because Nicole cheated on you, some other reason? Personally, I think the "Nicole knows why I filed for divorce", coupled with the almost instant Penelope Cruz fling is a cover for something else. That, or Nicole had an affair and the Penelope Cruz thing is an "in your face" thing to hurt her back. Why oh why am I so desperate to know the truth? Why would I KILL to have Julia Roberts call me up and say "Look, we broke up because I caught him wearing my underwear, and not the sexy, slinky underwear, but the big ol’ saggy-ass stained granny underwear, and every time I looked at him after that, all I could see was the saggy-ass underwear hanging down to his knees and that he was, y’know, all HANGING out of it, and it was too much, alright? Is THAT what you wanted to know, you nosy bitch?!" It’s not that I’m taking pleasure in the pain of others, GOD no, it’s just that I want to know WHY they broke up, and I’m not sure why. Of course, probably part of the reason why I read so many journals is because I have an insatiable need to know the details of the lives of others, and I hate it, OH how I hate it when they hint at something that’s going on in their lives and never say what it is. Drives me nuts! I think it should be the law that everyone has to share the private details of their life with me, and when I’m queen of the world, I shall make it so. "What? You bought a comforter and didn’t tell me that you were considering doing so?! OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!" I will also seize possession of Vince, oh yes…]]>