someone is a bastard and likes to pee up the side of the box, the litter boxes need to be taken outside and scrubbed vigorously – when the spud harassed me for the 34,986th time about making an appointment to have her hair cut. I finally forced myself to sit down and call and make the appointment – for 11:00 – and then scrambled to finish cleaning the laundry/ litter box room, and the master bathroom (which was getting nasty ’cause it’s been a few weeks since I’ve cleaned in there). I not only did all that, I also vacuumed the entire upstairs before I had to jump in the shower and get ready to go. Luckily, I’m a low-maintenance girl, and can go from shower to dressed and ready to go in about 15 minutes. I dropped the spud off at the hair salon and ran to Wal-Mart to buy some ear plugs. Then I went to Amoco to fill up the gas tank, and was back at the hair salon within half an hour. I cooled my heels for ten minutes or so, read the February 2001 issue of GQ (oh, that Edward Burns!), and then paid for the spud’s hair cut. On a side note, I think that that particular hair salon is on the edge of going out of business – there was only one person working, and a sign out front advertising booths for rent. I decided, since we were out already, to go to Sam’s and get a short list of stuff. Once we got there, we were wandering across the store toward the gum and candy aisle (we’re some gum-chewing fools around here) when an elderly gentleman hailed me. “Excuse me,” he said, with a large smile. I stopped and politely said “Yes?” He pointed at me, and then at the spud. “Which of you is the mother and which is the daughter?” he asked, still smiling. It took a moment to sink in, and then I laughed and resumed walking. He appeared to be QUITE proud of himself for that one. We were finally in line waiting to check out when another elderly gentleman walked toward my cart. Thinking he wanted to go around me, I pulled my cart back, but he put his hand on the edge of it and struck up a conversation about the shrimp I was buying. It was a short conversation, because to my knowledge, there are two simple ways to answer the question “Is that shrimp good?”, and I answered in the affirmative, not once but twice, sounding (I’m sure) like a big dork. By the time we got home, it was time for lunch, and the rest of the afternoon was spent in an orgy of laziness – in other words, the usual. * * * Thus far today I have spent many many MANY hours cleaning the floors in the downstairs portion of the house. I love the fact that we have hardwood floors in the library and foyer, but I hate the fact that I haven’t once been able to get them polished decently since we moved in over a year ago. Mopping leaves them streaked, and wet kitty toes leave them kitty-toed, and no matter what I’ve tried, they’ve remained streaked, even after I ran the Floormate over it. So I was resigned to streaky, unpolished-looking floors, until last week when I spied a bottle of Orange Glo Wood Floor Polish and Cleaner. After much thought, I decided to go for it, and bought the bottle. Then it sat under the sink for a week or so, until today. After running the Floormate over all the floors downstairs, I watched ER and waited for the floors to dry. Then I used the Orange Glo on the hardwood floors, and when it had dried, I saw that it was good. I mean, the floors aren’t going to be mistaken for new or anything, but it looks amazing compared to how it used to look. Two thumbs up to the Orange Glo. * * * This is a mighty exciting entry, isn’t it? Could I be any more interesting? Should I do an entry about watching paint dry, or what? * * * I rented Jason X and Kissing Jessica Stein today. Actually, before I rented the movies I looked for them at Movie Gallery, the movie store closest to our house, and thus the preferred store. I found Kissing Jessica Stein, but didn’t see Jason X anywhere. I stood in line to ask if they HAD it behind the counter, but after waiting several minutes at the end of a non-moving, very long line, I got pissed, put Jessica Stein back on the shelf, and headed for Hollywood Video, which is about a five minute drive. The entire way there I composed a letter in my head about the shoddy, crappy service at Movie Gallery, and how the movies are NEVER on the fucking shelf on the day they come out, and it’s getting MIGHTY FUCKING OLD. At Hollywood Video, I found Jessica Stein easily, again, but couldn’t seem to locate Jason X. I looked at all the movies that started with J, and saw it nowhere. I was about to ask the clerk (the good thing about Hollywood Video is that it’s rarely crowded during the week), when I passed the movies that start with G, and saw it sitting there. My snarky comment – I was actually going to sing the alphabet song, and ask which alphabet the people who work at Hollywood Video go by – was removed from my brain when the clerk asked if I was a Jason fan. “Hee!” I said. “Hahahahah! Uh, NO! It’s not for ME.” And it’s not – it’s for Fred and the spud. While they watch that craptastic movie, I’ll be upstairs watching Life with Bonnie and Less Than Perfect – neither of which I’ve seen, but about which I’ve heard good things. Even watching paint dry would be better than watching Jason X, I’m certain.]]>